Chapter Nineteen: Fears and Phobias

5/9/17


     Have you ever been so deeply terrified of something that it gives you the creepy-crawly heebie-jeebies whenever you even think about it? A lot of these fears come from experiences, but most of them, I feel, come from just watching it on TV or reading about it. The definition of an irrational fear, or phobia, is "a type of anxiety disorder that describes an excessive and irrational fear of a specific object, activity or situation." Some of these fears are mild and easier to ignore or get over, whereas others cripple your ability to function normally in your daily life. I took to Facebook tonight, and asked an open question: What are some of your irrational fears that you wish you could get over? The results were truly amazing. I had over 30 answers from friends, family, classmates co-workers, people that I hadn't talked to in months or years, people that I talk to every day. Many of the answers were things that I have been afraid of for my entire life, but some of them were things that I had never even thought about that got me thinking, and also some of them got my skin crawling. It's crazy how our minds can over-analyze things, make up worst-case scenarios, and be so creative as to imagine up things that would not even be likely, or in some cases, possible. It's a fascinating subject, really, and I was very interested in reading all the conversations that this question led to.

     The most common category that was mentioned were things like heights, standing on ladders and climbing up and down them, amusement park rides, bridges, and airplanes. I think those things all kind of go hand in hand, whether it's about heights or not. This is pretty much one of the most common fears, but the parts that stem off of that common fear are the irrational parts. I, for one, am afraid of literally all those things, to a certain extent. I'm very afraid of bridges. One person said that she is afraid she'll be driving over a bridge and the bridge will collapse and the car will fall into the water and she will drown. I've had that fear many times before. My fear of bridges used to be bad; I would have to close my eyes, cover my ears and hum while I was going over a bridge. Now I can't do that anymore because I'm the one driving, and it would be very unsafe to do so. Airplanes, you can be afraid of airplane crashes. Ahem, HAVE YOU SEEN THE SHOW LOST? Amusement park rides, you are literally trusting a large, fast-moving machine with your life, and you've read the articles about people flying out and dying. Even if most of them are hoaxes meant to do this exact thing to your brain. And finally, ladders. I climb on a ladder and my knees start wobbling and I look down and am afraid I'm going to wobble right off. It's scary. I don't think I'll ever get over my fear of heights. When I was younger, I did rock climbing at the YMCA. Now, I can barely climb up on a boulder without shaking in my boots. Also, there were many mentions of being afraid of the dark, which is a big one. I hate the dark when I'm outside or in an unfamiliar place. If it's just my house, I'm not AS afraid, but I usually have to have my phone flashlight on if it's dark in my house. Mostly because I'm more terrified of stubbing my toe or stepping on something than I am of the dark. Being outside in the woods in the dark was mentioned, and that one freaks me out to no end. No way am I going out in the woods in the dark. Animals, bugs, maniacs with weapons, those are things to be afraid of.

     After the heights, the most common fears were other living things. Bees, because they're terrifying, obviously. They literally have a STINGER. I've never once been stung, and I'm trying to keep it that way. My fear of bees came immediately after watching My Girl for the first time. Poor Little Thomas J never even had a chance. I was traumatized. Ticks, because of the blatantly obvious fact that they suck out your blood, and your soul, and they can give you Lyme disease which sounds like the least fun thing ever. Snakes, which I'm not AS afraid of because most of them around here are harmless, but have you seen Snakes On A Plane...? Whales, because they're large and one of them swallowed Jonah. Lobsters, because they have large claws that can pinch you. They are also related to what I call the most common fear of all: SPIDERS. I am SO AFRAID OF SPIDERS. One literally ran up my arm this morning and it was pretty large. I almost cried, I started screaming and ran away like a little baby. But that's how it is with a lot of people. Some people can literally pick up spiders (cough cough, JARED.) and I have absolutely no idea how. It makes me want to crawl out of my skin. I get the shivers whenever I just think about a spider, because then I start feeling like something is crawling on me. Another thing that I saw from a few people was a fear of butterflies, moths, and dragonflies "because of their little bodies and tentacle legs" (shout out to Danielle McKenna, always knows how to word everything perfectly). It was also mentioned a few times that people were afraid of bugs crawling up into them through their lady parts and laying eggs inside them. That one got me panicking, I can't lie. Last, but not least, there were mentions of people being afraid of mascots, facial masks and clowns. I can understand it. You can't see who's behind the mask, head or makeup. And if you've ever seen any scary movies ever, all three of those things have definitely been in them. It's enough to keep you awake at night.

     Another answer used more than a few times was the fear of being alone, abused, rejected, or abandoned. People fear being alone the most in this world, I think. I know everyone I have ever known has been afraid of that at least once in their life. It is one of the leading causes of suicide and depression. There is nothing people won't do to avoid being alone. We see it every day. We see abuse. We see rejection. We see abandonment. We see people dying alone. It's the saddest thing ever to see. And if you've experienced any of these things, you know how painful it really is. You see, I don't see any of these fears as "irrational". Maybe because it's something that happens often, and every day. Some people see that exact fact to be what makes it irrational. It all depends on opinion.

     The next category is cars/driving. Mostly car accidents, because they happen so often and can be life-ruining, whether they kill someone or injure them to a point that life as they know it will never be the same. Or just being deathly afraid that someone you love will end up getting hurt in a car accident. Then there's driving on the highway, which is a terrifying thing to do all on its own. Everyone is going so fast, and not using their blinker (especially Massholes, no offense to my Masshole friends), and there's road work and orange cones everywhere. One of my biggest fears is that I'll be going 65+ on the highway, and my tire will blow out and I'll go flying into another car, or big truck, or into the woods, or flip over or something. Big trucks, which terrify me, especially when I'm sandwiched between two of them on the highway. That also makes the highway thing worse. Another one was being a passenger in the car when someone else is driving, because you can't be in control of the car yourself and the person driving could get distracted, or drive like a maniac (also very common around here, sorry again Massholes) and some people just plain suck at driving.

    The next and final category is the miscellaneous category. There's the fear of cracking your joints leading to paralysis somehow, thunderstorms, the ocean, the dentist, tape measures, tendons in the body, restaurant silverware and how many other mouths it's been in, smelling bad, spontaneously combusting (good one Kevin), women (for real Mr. D?), diseases, and cameras being hidden in bathrooms everywhere you go. Some of these made me laugh, and I kind of felt bad for laughing. But wouldn't you, though?

     It really gives you something to think about. These people were all willing to share their fears with me, no matter how irrational they seemed, and people actually bonded and made friends over the ones they had in common. It's pretty scary to think about how many things in this world there actually are to be afraid of. And these weren't even a fraction of the irrational fears out there. I have so many that I know I have no reason to even be afraid of. Half of the things that terrify me are fictional scenarios that happened in the movies that I know would never even happen in the real world. So what makes us so afraid? What is it that makes these fears haunt us so deeply and so painfully? Our brains do this to us. Isn't it an amazing thing that our brains are so creative that they can come up with these things? It's just one of the things I've been thinking about today, especially with that ginormous spider crawling up my arm this morning. Thank you to everyone who contributed to this post, I really appreciate all the feedback I received today! I will definitely be doing more things like this in the future. Goodnight all!

xx